The dreaded due date is here:

Well,  its eventually arrived.  Today is the day our babies should have been born according to the due date calculators and my FS.  I have been dreading this day for over a month now, and yes, I am sad, but I think I’m holding up better than I thought I would.  On the one side [...]

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I am back!

Hello all!  Happy new Year to you!  I am finally back and able to post again.  We came back from holiday last Thursday, but then we were without internet connection until now.  Except for a short while once when I was able to logon for about half an hour.  I have a lot of blog [...]

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Could have, should have…

I cannot help to think about what could have happened or what should have happened.  I’m talking about my pregnancy.  The due date (6 January 2011) is getting closer and closer and if I think about the fact that my pregnancy started out as a twin pregnancy, it just makes me realize that I would most [...]

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Revelations about the secrets:

Psalm 18:28-36 (NIV):  “28 You, O LORD, keep my lamp burning; my God turns my darkness into light.  29 With your help I can advance against a troop; with my God I can scale a wall.  30As for God, his way is perfect; the word of the LORD is flawless. He is a shield for all [...]

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From head knowledge to heart knowledge…

Most often I do not really want to blog about my feelings, especially lately because I don’t want my blog to be a lot of whining about how sad I am or how depressed I am.  But I realised that you probably have no idea how I’m feeling with all that we are going through [...]

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5113 Days happily married!

Today is our anniversary.  5113 days happily married, or 730 weeks and 3 days, or for those who have no idea how long that is – 14 years!  It’s been 14 good years, but also hard years.  I never knew what I promised that day 14 years ago when I said:  “for better or worse…” [...]

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A new commitment to God:

Last week I was metaphorically speaking at a crossroads and had to make a very important decision. One I never thought I would have to make again, as I thought I had already made that decision quite some time ago. You all know about Shumi and the tumour he has and the fact that we [...]

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Better than a Hallelujah

I love this song, I can’t find the original music video on You Tube so I’m posting from GodTube… http://www.godtube.com/featured/video/amy-grant-better-hallelujah-official-music-video/all The lyrics: God loves a lullaby In a mothers tears in the dead of night Better than a Hallelujah sometimes. God loves a drunkards cry, The soldiers plea not to let him die Better than [...]

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I need to stand strong…

I’ve been feeling very sad these last few days…  I’ve been crying a lot and I’m sure DH is at his wit’s end.   On Saturday I had a little breakdown –  about our miscarriage, Shumi’s tumour and my mom’s health situation.  And I think it’s not just that – I’m surrounded by pregnant women around me [...]

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I’m tired:

Today we went for a walk with Shumi.  We live in a security complex where about half of the houses have been built and the other half is either open stands or houses in the process of being built.  Shumi and all the other dogs walk around freely and get along well.  We know almost [...]

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